How To Deal With Pain Properly


I am in pain.

Okay, that’s not entirely true.

I am currently quite alright – I’m listening to Donald Lawrence’s ‘There Is a King You’ which always makes me want to run out into the big, bad world and CONQUER. Unfortunately, I don’t feel like this at every point in the day. Actually, my current pain is like an inconsistent guy, coming and going as, and when, he pleases. I’m never quite sure when the memory of last week’s events will wash over me and cause my eyes to sting so I am never quite prepared. This pain can only by medicated God and time so I am currently allowing both to work on me.

If you’re reading this and you’re in pain, I am really sorry that we are sharing this boat – it’s not very comfortable, it’s incredibly insecure and most of us would rather drown as swimming to the shore feels like too much effort (why am I so dramatic?). However, I want us all to swim and win so please keep reading, I may have found us a route to the glorious shore.

You can do quite a few things with your pain:

1) Ignore it

Ignore the hurt, ignore the negative thoughts and do your best to pretend that the pain is as real as Narnia. Those who wronged you/those who you wronged are not addressed and life continues as it always has; nothing changes because nothing has changed…right?

2) Pretend that everything is okay

This is slightly different to ignoring the pain. You recognise that something bad has happened and acknowledge that you are very upset about it. However, rather than express this thing to God and to a few close loved ones, you pretend as though you are fine. You cry at night and smile during the day, which, of course, is a great way to deal with things!

That’s a joke by the way – one of the worst we can do during a painful season is to pretend that everything is okay; not only is it exhausting, it is also self-destructive.

3) Face it

Now, now, now, this is not an excuse to throw a pity party; pity parties are morbid events which should only occur in dire situations, as infrequently as possible and for (very) short periods of time. When I say ‘Face it’ I mean that you should do your best to objectively assess the situation:

            What could have been done differently?

            What have I learnt about myself?

            What have I learnt about those involved?

            What lessons is God trying to teach me?

Finally, you should ask yourself whether you are crying about it more than you are praying about it. I think too often we spend more time crying about our problems than we do praying about them. So pray about it and let God know how bad things are, don’t hide from Him because:

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

Praying for you and I,

J xxx

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