Why I Stopped Being Afraid Of Change

There are many things in life that refuse to stay the same. No matter how much you’re enjoying their present state, there is nothing you can do stop them transforming, and once they have, you jut have to adapt. The weather is an example you’ll be familiar with if you live in Britain, or the seasons if you live anywhere on Earth. No matter how much you’re enjoying the long days of Summer, Autumn and Winter will follow and remind you that having daylight is something to be grateful for. (Speaking of daylight why is it now dim by 4pm and pitch black by 6?! I do understand that we have shorter days now but I don’t remember the darkness being this severe. What will happen in January, one hour of sunlight for lunch sandwiched between a pitch black journey to and from work?!?! Alas, I digress.) My point is that time, and all the joys/sorrows it has to bring, waits for no man. Whatever your sentiments, you have to get with the programme.

As I child I remember looking forward to the day things would change. The days I’d get to choose what I wore each day, free from the oppression of school uniform, the days I’d get to tell the chef what I wanted for dinner, instead of being forced to consume my 5 a day by a tag team of Jamie Oliver and my mother (if you’re reading this Jamie, I’m still not over you getting rid of the vending machines), the day I’d get swooped off my feet by Prince Charming and live happily ever after in my beautiful castle. 

You can probably tell that my views on growing up were somewhat idealistic. I remember turning 13 and feeling like I’d really developed into a big woman. I may have only been in year 8 but now I had become a teenager, I could now follow suit of all the teenagers before me, and rebel against ‘the man.’ LOL. My mum soon put me in my place about that- it was still her house, her rules, and my new found age wasn’t going to do anything to change that. Still, I looked forward to growing up and getting all of the freedom I knew came with old age. I ignored the people telling me to enjoy my youth, to enjoy life in the moment because one day things would get complicated, until one day, I started paying bills, and having to make the difficult decisions they had spoken about, and realised I had become one of them.

The future looses its ‘happily ever after’ Disney edge, when you realise the things you’ve dreamed of might remain out of reach, and the things you were looking forward to come with a caution sign. You leave university without the foggiest of what you’d like to do, let alone the 5 year plan they ask you to recite in interviews. You meet someone and fall in love, wondering if you dare have the audacity to believe you won’t follow in the divorce statistics and trends. You realise that believing in yourself doesn’t equate to getting everything you think you deserve. You wonder what you’ll actually have achieved by 30 and you question if life will ever stop feeling like a hard grind.

That can be the reality of growing up. Fairytale endings begin to fade along with the feeling that your opportunities are endless. The future is one big uncertainty so how are you supposed to look forward to it?

There is a constant.

Whether you believe in him or not, there is a God whose love for you doesn’t waver, whose help is ever- present in times of trouble, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever. If you’ve read my posts about the crazy year I had in 2014, you’ll know that in one summer the trajectory of my life, filled with a good degree and grad scheme went on a huge diversion, but it’s one year later and I’m still standing, thanks to one man. Jesus.

If you’ve lived for any length of time you’ll know that good things don’t always happen to good people, God doesn’t even say that loving him means that good things will always happen to you (no matter how much you put in the offering, and how many hours you spend on your knees in prayer.) God promises to be with you through the changes, hold your hands through the storms, never leave you nor forsake you.

For that reason, the future is bright. You have nothing to worry about when to live is Christ and to die is gain. You might still have to face weekday mornings with someone’s armpit in your face, and a boss you can’t stand, and and exams you wish you didn’t have to take, but you can find peace in the knowledge that God has a plan, and the one he has for you is good.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” ‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11‬ 

Love you like a full English and a cup of tea


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