Tag Archives: fashion

How To Look Good Naked

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I love make-over shows.  Maybe it’s the idea that you can start with a woman lacking in confidence, unaware of her beauty, and with a few  make-up tips and better fitting clothes, said lady transforms into a swan right before our very eyes. You feel like you’ve gone on the journey with her and you’re nearly as elated as she is when she finally gets to see how breath-taking she can look at The Big Reveal. ‘How to look good naked,’ is probably one of my favourite make-over shows, especially because the master of fashion A.K.A. Gok Wan, manages to transform appearances and multiply confidence without anyone undergoing nips here and tucks there at the hands of a plastic surgeon. (No I’m not anti plastic surgery per se, I just think it’s always nice when you can work with the looks God gave someone and still make them feel beautiful.)

Despite my allegiance to the show, if you’ve ever watched an episode,  you will have also noticed that the show doesn’t actually fulfill it’s branding, and when the hours up, you won’t be any steps closer to improving your naked body. Unlike Gok, I am solemnly swearing this beautiful morning to not only provide looking good naked advice, but also feeling good naked tips. Look good= feel good? Or is it, feel good= look good? Is it just me or does your outward appearance have a strong correlation with how you feel on the inside? When you haven’t got that shape up, you’re edges need perming, or your skin is being an enemy of progress and breaking out all over the gaff, it’s really hard to still feel like you’re great and you have good things going for you. There’s an interesting relationship between how you feel and how you look, so, sort out one of them, and you’re halfway to happiness.

Maybe I’m just a shallow lass but when the mirror is telling me things I don’t want to hear it’s really hard to put my happy face on.

Last summer I came to a realisation. I remember I was looking through my Facebook photos when it suddenly dawned on me, and I felt a huge urge to share my recent discovery. As I picked up the phone to inform my various amigos, I broke the news to them gently: I wasn’t a beaut. Now don’t get me wrong, before this day I wasn’t under some impression that I was a head-turner or anything worthy of breath holding, but I did feel ‘more happy than sad’ when I faced my reflection. It was weird; all of a sudden I had been hit with this new reality that I was absolutely nothing special. Of course my friends responded in the way they do to most of the melodramatic things I say and rolled their eyes, telling me my utterances were foolish and foundation-less. But it’s like the more I said it, the more I came to terms with the average Joe I had always been but only realised I’d become. That’s when the change began…

I’d told myself I was Plain Jane and from that day I couldn’t see anything else. I wasn’t at despair with my mug-shot, it just didn’t bring me any kind of joy. If in the summer I only had an inclining that I was just your average girl, by the winter I had completely become her. I looked in the mirror and saw a ‘something lacking, nothing to write home’ about lass, looking back at me,  and didn’t even realise the effect it was having on my outlook on life. I thought I was complacent with a ‘who cares if I’m not beautiful, why should I get to feel nice anyway’ attitude but it was slowly eating away at me and the sadness I felt when faced with my reflection spread to other areas of my life and hovered over me like a grey cloud ready to rain on my parade. It’s strange because we tell ourselves that there’s more to us than looks and then spend a whole lot of time letting our  appearances govern how we feel and the confidence we lay claim to. So there I was, in  a rut that I didn’t even know I was stuck in, when one moment threw me out of synch with my ‘I’m ugly, self-pity’, routine.

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Psalm 139:14

Bible study one Monday got the cogs in my head turning as I was reminded of scriptures I absent-mindedly recite: life and death is in the power of the tongue. That was it. Hey presto! I had singly handedly made myself ugly and If I wanted to feel beautiful again I needed to speak it over myself, which is  exactly what I did. Waking up and finding nothing in my appearance to smile about I looked into my eyes and told myself I was fearfully and wonderfully made. If God says I’m wonderful that means I’m a spice even when I just feel like rice with no salt.(spice= pretty person.) By the end of the week I had got my mojo back.

You can call me crazy all you like, but I genuinely did speak some pretty over my life, and within a week I saw it.

I guess I learnt three things.

Firstly: If you believe it you’ll see it.

I’ve always been a big believer in this so I don’t know why I let myself believe something I didn’t want to be true. It’s like self-fulfilling prophecy: once you convince someone they’ll amount to nothing, they start believing you and stop trying so hard to achieve. The Bible tells us everything we need to know about ourselves so when ideas come into our heads that don’t match up with what God says about us then we need to kick those thoughts to the curb where they belong.

Secondly: Don’t say things you don’t want to become/remain true.

Our words are way more powerful than we give them credit for. God made the whole world by speaking because:what we say, we create. This means we have to be ultra-careful to not curse ourselves and not let others curse us. We may have all felt like the exam we’ve just taken was a struggle but WE are not going to fail, if YOU feel like YOU are going to fail don’t include ME in your sentence. I know I sound extreme, but it’s time we started taking the things we say, and the things said about us more seriously.

Lastly: You are beautiful.

You may not fit into the current mass media definition of beauty but that’s the great thing about the world we live in, opinions change. God doesn’t. You might never feel world pretty, but as long as you know you’re God wonderful, to heck with magazine portrayal.

To everyone wishing they were model pretty, remember that your God defined beauty before any human could say what was the right and wrong way to look. Find your reflection in the Bible, there’s way more truth in that than your mirror.

 

Love lots

 

Dani xxxxx

Why Faking It Isn’t a Long-Term Solution

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If there’s anything we have all( me, you, and the entire population that walk the Earth) have perfected, it’s faking how we feel.  Whether it’s to save someone’s feelings, or too protect your own, faking, doesn’t seem to be going out of fashion.

Disclaimer: I am the queen of faking it

I don’t care how good you think your poker face is, I am the best at  hiding how I really feel. (Mainly because I’m saved now, and if I haven’t mastered thinking godly thoughts, I can at least begin with exhibiting godly actions.) I’m forever listening to people’s story and inwardly rolling my eyes or thinking of ways to hide my shock and slight judgement at the outrageous piece of information they’ve just given me. Side-note: I’m being honest; God’s still working on me. Other times the thought of letting you in to see my heart, just brings a whole new fear to the pile I am struggling with.

FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT has become so ingrained in our psyches that we don’t even attempt an honest way of living. Of course common courtesy is important, you don’t need to go around telling people exactly what you think if your thoughts aren’t going to be beneficial, but why do we have to lie? Why must we put on a persona that is at odds with how we really feel and tricks people into thinking that we are some kind of Superhuman, always happy, always interesting, never facing any real-life drama?

Don’t believe you’re part of the faking crew? I bet you (obviously not money-I’m a student) that you can count on one hand the amount of times you’ve answered honestly to the question: “How are you?” We say, ‘fine’, we smile, ‘great’, and some of us even enthusiastically nod, ‘really good thanks’,  when really we mean ‘exhausted,’ ‘broken,’ and fed-up.’ If you live in Britain then you know the rule of having a stiff upper lip, that we’re all obliged to obey. Is it not just a bit crazy to think people feel the need to apologise at the funerals of their dead family and friends, because they’ve shed a tear. Someone close to you has died, if you want to cry, scream, or sit silently in your grief, then you are FULLY within your rights to do so.

Maybe you’re not tired of faking it, but I sure am.

So what next? Should we all cry at bus stops and allow ourselves to break down in front of strangers that simply asked us how we were out of politeness? (I hear you hoping there’s another way). Luckily for everyone there is.

Be Joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Romans 12:12

Once you get past the fact that this scripture is so eloquently encouraging and perfect to be made into a meme that would definitely drum up a good amount of shares and Retweets, you can see how powerful it is. In one line we have instructions for all of our feelings and the need to fake it evaporates. You don’t have to conceal your emotions when you’re dealing with them. Why not have a re-read. Not only are we told how to feel, we are given advice on what do. Instead of faking it, when you’re faced with affliction be patient and faithful in prayer. Don’t just take on board the joy and the patience and forget to pray. It’s a bit worrying the lack of interest people seem to have in praying, maybe more of us would attend prayer meeting if we acknowledged that prayer  is literally the only thing that saves you. I’ve said it before but I shall re-iterate: Life and death is in the power of the tongue, so whatever you’re saying is UBER important. Pray because you feel sad, pray because you need the strength to persist. When in doubt pray and when you’re weak pray. Have you noticed the pattern yet? When you stop communicating with God it’s easy to start believing that He has forsaken you, when really you’ve just distanced yourself from him. Especially when you’re in the midst of the storm: communication is key. Ignoring God when you’re battling for your life is literally like swimming away from your life jacket. Nonsensical, right?!

Last week I told you that I was full of sorrow, and I thank God that I have a new attitude , but I should let you know that the situation hasn’t changed. I seek God daily and speak to my Heavenly Father constantly because communicating with Him is the ONLY, and when I say only, I mean ONLY thing that gives me the strength for each new day.

Let me quickly clarify. I know I’ve told you to stop feeling like you have to fake how you feel, but I’m not supporting walking around with Sadface 24/7.

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my saviour. Habakkuk 3:17-18

Sometimes life chucks things at you that are slightly more serious than breaking a nail or having to wait for hours to sit in your barber’s chair. When there’s nothing obvious to be thankful for you still have to CHOOSE to rejoice.

Dear God, I’m struggling to find a reason to be thankful but I choose to praise you because you are my God. I cast my burdens onto you, because you care for me and I let go of sorrow and choose to walk in your Joy. Because the Joy of the Lord is my strength, I thank you for the strength for each new day. In Jesus’ name, Amen

Luff Dani xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

Events in April

Beauty Uncovered 05/04/14 This event has passed

logoThe Inner Attitude invites you to a fashion show with a difference. Every woman is beautiful but sometimes the issues of life can cast a veil over our true beauty. Come and be a witness and discover your true beauty through fashion.

Divine Experience 07/04/14  This event has passed

1779870_491244290981148_13417677_nWoman With a Purpose invites you to their next Divine Experience evening. We know it’s not easy to bare our scars, wounds and hurts, but the reality is, they are already evident in ways that we may or may not realise; through our personality, opinion of oneself, and relationship choices. They seek to give you a safe platform to bare all and allow God to penetrate your heart and soul.

Putting The Fun Back Into Fundraising 07/04/14 This event has passed

Put-the-fun-back-into-fundraising1Help raise precious funds for the terminally ill in South Eastern Europe with great food, drink and dance! Ayse Asim will be providing entertainment on the night with fun Latin Zumba Dances and the opportunity to participate.

 

 

 

Urban Island Kitchen 13/04/14 This event has now passed

1240420_449377685192358_2003447825_nUrban Island Kitchen is a monthly Christian Hangout with very affordable Mauritian and Antiguan food and a live Gospel DJ playing the Latest Urban Gospel music. Go and feel at home at their kitchen (you can even take off your shoes!) Don’t miss out on the opportunity to feed the soul with good food, good music and great company! See you there.

 

Gifted Expressions 19/04/14 This event has now passed

971280_10152360241496118_7888024490352885647_n (1)‘Gifted Expressions’ is specially orchestrated by the Holy Spirit, for the glorification of God above all things. The purpose of this movement is to establish a platform where individuals are able to minister to a diverse crowd using different God-inspired talents that has been placed upon their life. This event will consist of poetry/spoken word, drama, testimonies, worship and a brief word of exhortation by Apostle Elijah Israel Chanak of Qadosh Kingdom Movement to bring spiritual awareness to the body of Christ.

A Woman’s Sacred Calling 26/04/14 This event has passed

EWC 2014 - Promo Flyer (updated)Come and be blessed at the Empowered Woman Conference 2014. What are you doing about the younger generation of females rising up around you? Do you have enough in you to teach them how to live a sacred life?  Are you pouring out the nuggets that are so needed to nurture their growth and teach them how to soar like an eagle?  Are there opportunities of growth in you that should be tapped so that you can be effective for the next generation? The Empowered Woman Conference 2014 theme is a call to women to clean out, put first things first, get into God’s order so that you can grow higher and pour deeper into others who need meat and not milk.

Brain Health Conference 2014 26/04/14 This event has passed

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One of its kind, this conference will be addressing three major issues:

  • How to keep your mind healthy and potentially delay the onset of dementia and memory loss
  •  Is the Church equipped to manage mental health?
  •  A Christian approach to managing mental and emotional health

Come and acquire the tools to maintain optimal mental health using a Christian cognitive approach.