Tag Archives: weighed down

How To Lose The Unwanted Weight

  
Have you ever been in a situation where you have been so disappointed by people that you begin to lose trust in humanity? When you have had a misunderstanding with someone and you just can’t bring yourself to admit that you’re wrong? Or when you are so deeply wronged that the thought of forgiving is becoming hard to comprehend? 

When my wallet got stolen recently, I was that person. I still recall the anger, frustration and regret I felt when it happened. I was having a mini catch-up with a friend and a lady sat opposite to me used the opportunity to take my wallet. The moment I realised, I felt violated. I was mad. Initially my frustrations were with the woman that stole from me. Soon, I was mad at the world. 

 

For an entire week, it was unbearable for me to let the feelings from the incident go. Although, I knew I could get my items replaced, the utter injustice was constantly on my mind. I guess it was because it was hard to forgive her, but most importantly, I just didn’t think she deserved my forgiveness. 

 

We have probably all felt a similar inner rage. Some of you reading might even be feeling in it now. For you, it might not be a pickpocketer that you have found hard to forgive. It might be that “friend” that you had a misunderstanding with and haven’t spoken to throughout this year; because you are still rehashing past scenarios. Or it might be that person you once shared an intimate relationship with and things didn’t go the way you intended. Either way, you keep holding on to the small fragments of the relationship, not willing to let it go and move on. Maybe the hurt lies closer to home. Your parents could have wronged you with their actions or their absence and although you’re older now, you hold on to that resentment, still feeling bitter about it, after all they should have treated you better.

 

 

…we have all felt like that at one point or the other, justifying why are right to hold onto our pain, getting weighed down by the grudge we’re holding…

 

In Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus tells us to forgive because we have been forgiven.

 

“ For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins”.

 

How do we then forgive?

 

Offering forgiveness will be always easier said than done if we because we decide to live in our feelings holding on to the wrongs people have committed against us. We are only disadvantage for ourselves as the longer we hold onto un-forgiveness, the longer we stay hurt. Being unforgiving does not heal us. It binds us. No-one wants to live like that!
Since forgiveness goes against our instincts. we have to aim to forgive by faith, out of obedience; whether we feel like it or not. We must trust God to do the work in us that needs to be done so that the we can forgive others as he has forgiven us.

 

Forgiveness brings peace. It means that I no longer give another person the power to have control over me. I release myself! 

 

It doesn’t mean we’re going to sit down together for coffee next week or we are going to chill and hangout. However, forgiveness means that I am not going to carry the hurt anymore. 

 

I am letting it go to Jesus….

 

Love 

 

Esther xx

 

Why I’ve Stopped Living In Denial

  
Have you ever woken up and realised that you’re not worn out because you didn’t get enough sleep, or because you’ve spent too many hours at the gym, but because your mind has been thinking of a thousand problems at once and each one remains unsolved?

This is how problems generally work in my life:

1. I realise problem ‘x’ exists 

2. I rack my brain to produce a plan a, scrap plan b, only to conclude plans l-m-n-o and p won’t work either

3. I think about giving ‘x’ to God to resolve but I haven’t touched base with him in so long I’m uncertain he’s able to make it better

4. I stress-well actually I secretly stress. I go on through life as normal and try and push problem x to the furthest point in my mind whilst my subconscious brain continues to think of solutions, and decide those solutions won’t work, so thinks of some more in a hopeless cycle 

5. I despair

6. I run back to Jesus. I don’t even care if he fixes things, I just want to be living under his wing, trusting that he’ll give me the strength to feel at peace in the midst of whatever storm has been raining on my parade.

Reading that, you’d wonder why I didn’t just run back to Jesus in the first place. Why try to figure things out on your own when you know you’re going to find your senses and come back to God in the end? There is a reason. Actually in fairness, there are many reasons, but they all begin with one…

I will tell you a secret. Not many people know what I’m about to share so brace yourself. I am quite proud. Not in the sense that I think I’m better than people, I’m just confident in my abilities to the extent that I rarely (every bone in my body fights against) ask for help. I might even think the person offering to help would do a better job than I could but I’m too proud to admit that, and the mere thought that I could do it myself even if it does take me twice as long, means all help is rejected and the thought of asking for it is ludicrous. I know what you’re thinking- 

“Even when the person your asking is God?!”
 Yes.

So this has been one of those weeks. I know I can’t possibly solve all the issues life has presented me with, but I hate to admit defeat so much, I have ran away, instead of toward the God that can make it all better. I’m not saying God is a wizard, he’s definitely not a genie in a bottle that grants all of your wishes, but he does give you the ability to overcome every kink and disruption to this journey of life. 

Today I admit defeat. I admit that I need God and that life is only worth living when it revolves around him. I haven’t the energy to keep running away so I’ll stop.

Cast your burdens unto Jesus for he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

When you give your problems to Jesus, it’s not that they immediately disappear and life returns to perfection, but that weight from constantly trying to find a solution is lifted, along with all of the stress it brought. Nobody said being a Christian would be a breeze, but Jesus said my yoke is easy and my burden is light

If you, like me, woke up realising you had been trying to fight a war all by yourself, take the best advice you’ll ever get. Give all  your worries to Jesus, who cares for you and wants you to be free. The stress just isn’t worth it.

Love y’all 
Dani xx